Home

Home is where I want to be
Pick me up and turn me round
I feel numb, born with a weak heart
I guess I must be having fun
The less we say about it the better
Make it up as we go along
Feet on the ground, head in the sky
It's okay, I know nothing's wrong, nothing

Hey, I got plenty of time
Hey, you got light in your eyes
And you're standing here beside me
Out of the passing of time
Never for money, always for love
Cover up and say goodnight, say goodnight

Home is where I want to be
But I guess I'm already there
I come home, she lifted up her wings
I guess that this must be the place
I can't tell one from another
Did I find you, or you find me?
There was a time before we were born
If someone asks, this is where I'll be, where I'll be

Hey, we drift in and out
Hey, sing into my mouth
Out of all those kinds of people
You got a face with a view
I'm just an animal looking for a home
Share the same space for a minute or two
And you'll love me 'til my heart stops
Love me 'til I'm dead
Eyes that light up, eyes look through you
Cover up the blank spots
Hit me on the head

David Byrne

When I met Gary I literally fell in to the space and home of what is him. I had never felt so at home. I knew where his key was and I let myself in and the couch was small but it fit all of my body on it. I read all of his books and listened to all of his CDs and looked at all of his pictures and waited for him. We were friends for a long time and we still are very good friends. But mostly it was that once he got home I could curl my entire body up in to him and lay there for a very long time. Sometimes there were things to talk about and sometimes there was nothing and either way it was perfect.
Going through the challenges of the last few months I have come to know what it is that marriage is really all about and it is as beautiful as the forest in the fall and as bittersweet as goodbye and hello all mixed together. People are always splitting up and moving on and I feel so much sadness for them and although I have had my moments of wondering about all the different lives I could have had with different choices I may have made I could not imagine having those lives without this man with me. He comes with me everywhere. He is there when I am in a really bad mood and am a total bitch to be around and he holds me when I cry and laughs at my jokes and believes that I can do pretty much anything. He is the one who taught me how to love my children unconditionally because he loves me this way.
There is no one I would rather spend the day with and no one who knows me like him and when he has sickness and when he is in pain I will pray that it ends and I will watch him sleep.
There is nothing I wish more for my children than to have the kind of love that I have with Gary.