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Monday, June 6, 2011

Mother Natures Son

In the last week I have had the chance to look back on this blog. What was supposed to be a blog about a homeschooling family, I realize now became a blog about a family in the midst of illness and watching our beautiful grandfather/father/husband/friend die.

It happened so suddenly. It happened on such a happy day. We were all running through the house, grabbing clothes and high fiving, grabbing Haley at the last minute to take her with us to the Cape for a long memorial day weekend.
It was the last time I worked. I pulled in from a long day of visiting patients and we were off. Going to the Cape.
I had stopped. I'm so grateful that I stopped. I didn't always stop and I wish now that I spent so many more moments in that house with him. But that day, May 27th, I did stop. I kissed him on his head and I told him, "next time I see you, you will have new lungs." He smiled at me.
He had a great day that day. He told me he felt better than he had in days. He smiled at us. He got us last.
And then we were off.
And that was the last time I saw him.

How quickly life can go.

He died suddenly in my mother's arms, a sudden and fast heart attack, respiratory failure, the death certificate said it happened in minutes.
He had pulmonary fibrosis for years but his death happened in minutes.
I hope you didn't feel any pain, John.
I hope you are at peace John.

Today I got in the car and the song on the radio was "Mother Nature's son." It was one of his favorites and I know he was with me.

But I wish that he was with me.

2 comments:

Theresa said...

I am so sorry to hear of his passing.

I began reading your blog several years ago when I was trying to work up the courage to homeschool my girls. I did finally get up that courage this year and it's been wonderful.

I've enjoyed your posts about John and I've been praying for him and your family.

singingfamily said...

thanks Theresa, that means a lot. I am glad to hear you are loving homeschooling.